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Sunday, January 19, 2014

THE CRITICS CHOICE AND SAG AWARDS WEEK IN REVIEW ...



So I totally missed the Critic's Choice Awards ... I mean where the hell as I?!  I didn't even know they were on television!  I must be losing it folks.  So I'll post just a few pics and then onto the SAG Awards ...

2014 CRITIC'S CHOICE AWARDS
Miss Abigail Breslin.  She looks very vampish and busty like, which is odd considering she is only like 17.  I mean, she looks pretty and all, but this whole ensemble makes her look like a 35 year old 1950's sex bomb ... don't you think?  Amy needs to tone it down ... just a little.  Grade:  C
  
So I guess Meryl and Julia are now BFFs since they are both in the same acting category (Julia you wish).  As for the frocks, both look like very serious, very unstylish, middle-aged actresses.  I just call it like I see it people.  Grade:  C-
julia-roberts-meryl-streep-critics-choice-awards-4.jpg
Meryl's dress is EXACTLY like one my mother owned in 1967 and Julia's is exactly like the wallpaper my girlfriend had in her dining room ... IN 1980.   
 meryl-streep-julia-roberts-2014-critics-choice-awards.jpg
(Pssst ... I think it's really funny how Julia thinks Meryl is really her BFF.  We all know that after award season she's gonna drop her like a bad habit.  I mean MERYL STREEP and JULIA ROBERTS????) Seriously?  Please.   

critics choice awards 2014 jared leto red carpet
The gorgeous Jared Leto (aka Jesus) ... took the award for Best Supporting Actor.  Grade:  A+   GORGEOUS, GORGEOUS, GORGEOUS.
Lupita Nyong'o - PERFECTION.  This gal is fast becoming a style icon.  She's AMAZING.  Love this simple, white gown ... ELEGANCE PERSONIFIED.  Grade:  A+++ 
 
The GORGEOUS Margot Robbie.  I loved this jumpsuit.  Very hip and elegant.  Loved her hair, loved her makeup, loved it all ... Grade:  A+ with a twirl and a snap .... WINNER WINNER WINNER
margot-robbie-critics-choice-movie-awards-2014
One of my favorite gals, Sandra Bullock.  Looked beautiful is this berry colored gown with little ruffles and pretty belt.  Simple, elegant.  Grade:  A+   WINNER
sandra-bullock-critics-choice-movie-awards-2014


2014 SCREEN ACTOR'S GUILD AWARDS

Ariel Winter ... JUNE IS BUSTING OUT ALL OVER .... GIRL. 

1.  She looks like she can't breathe; and
2. Her breasteses look like they're in pain. 

Set them free Ariel!  Set them free!  Grade:  DD's


 Amy Adams looking very elegant, very Wallis Simpson.  Grade:  A
  

The amazing Cate Blanchett winner of the Best Actress award ... I love this pink gown with the sparkle on the edge and neckline.  Grade:  A+  WINNER

'Where else do you get the chance to dress up other than at these things?': Cate told E! News that she 'loves costume' and the opportunity to get glammed up for these red carpet events

The exquisite Lupiga Nyong'o.  LOVE TURQUOISE!!  This gown is amazing!  The color against her skin is absolutely gorgeous.  Her makeup, her hair, everything is PERFECTION!  A+++   WINNER WINNER WINNER. 

Winners are grinners: Amy Adams, Jennifer Lawrence and Lupita Nyong'o (from left) were on-trend in their gowns in various shades of blue as they hit the red carpet at the Screen Actors Guild Awards held in Los Angeles on Saturday

Sarah Paulson.  Her hair ruined the entire look.  The dress looks like it was made from an old parachute and the shoes are ALL wrong with those chains around the ankle.  Makeup - was TERRIBLE!  She looks as white as her dress.  A real shame because she is a pretty woman ... Grade:  F-

Leading ladies: Modern Family's Julie Bowen (left) chose a 'very fashion-forward' strapless Carolina Herrera gown, Emilia Clarke (centre) of Games Of Thrones was stylish in a metallic one-shouldered Calvin Klein Collection dress, while American Horror Story's Sarah Paulson picked a fun and flirty voluminous white number

Jennifer Lawrence.  VERY simple.  She's adorable and she has a great body.  I'm not really feeling this purply/black sequince fabric, but for the overall look she is very elegant.  Mama's giving Jennifer a B+

Working it! J-Law looked youthful and modern in her strapless shiny sequinned gown and black satin peep-toe platforms, which perfectly complemented her cropped blonde locks and perfectly-applied make-up

Ok, I'm sure by now you all know that I can't stand Julia Roberts.  Here she is in a pink jumpsuit (just like the one I had in 1977 EXCEPT mine looked good on me).  What is this thing?!  It's STUPID that's what it is!  No bling, no glam .... BORING.  Grade:  F-

Surprise! Julia Roberts' pink outfit actually turned out to be a Valentino jumpsuit, which she teamed with silver YSL heels, a matching Roger Vivier clutch and Wilfredo Rosado earrings

Kerry Washington.  Kerry, Kerry, Kerry ... WHAT WERE YOU THINKING GIRL?!  You looked so beautiful at the Golden Globes!  I know you're pregnant and all but this ensemble looks like it would look on me!  A 50-something year old gal with a big ol stomach.  NO.  This is A TERRIBLE LOOK for you.  And you were doing so well too.  Hon ... though I hate to do it, you're getting a big, fat F CAUSE THIS WAS ALL WRONG.

Daring: Pregnant Kerry Washington (left) flashed her midriff in custom Prada, Maria Menounos (centre) got cheeky as she flashed her tone pins, while Jane Krakowski stood out in her mint green asymmetrical number

Emma Thompson and Meryl Streep.  Emma Thompson can do no wrong in my eyes.  She's fabulous and funny and a terrific actress and I LOVE HER!  Meryl always looks so staid.  Very bookish and sensible.  I'd like to see her glam it up a little. 

Emma:  A+  .... Love the 1940's applique and the slightly padded shoulders.  Even love the flat sandals.    

Emma Thompson In 1930s William Vintage – 2014 SAG Awards

Meryl, love .... you simply MUST glam it up a bit!  Look at Helen Mirren.  She ALWAYS looks fabulous AND sexy.  Take a chance girl ... no one will think less of you.  I promise.  Grade:  C (for average, safe and boring).  And glasses?  Really Meryl?  We all know you're a serious actress but have some fun for crying out loud.

Always stylish: Claire Danes (left) wore an unusual layered cream and black frock with dark blue metallic detail and a sheer black overlay, while Meryl Streep went for a much more simplistic look in her black off-the-shoulder tea-length frock and matching black accessories
  
Claire Danes - Grecian Goddess gone punk gladiator.  There is just too much going on here.  Grade:  F-

Always stylish: Claire Danes (left) wore an unusual layered cream and black frock with dark blue metallic detail and a sheer black overlay, while Meryl Streep went for a much more simplistic look in her black off-the-shoulder tea-length frock and matching black accessories

Sandra Bullock looking very pretty in my least favorite color of all time.  HOWEVER, love the dress, love the shoes, love the hair, love it all.  Grade:  A+

Green with envy: Sandra Bullock shone in her strapless shimmery emerald Lanvin frock that tapered in and featured a bow waist detail and a front slit, which she teamed with metallic gold strappy peep-toe stilettos and a matching clutch

 Camila Alves .... VA-VOOM!  Wow .. what a sex bomb.  Although she really could use some jewelry.  Grade:  A+

Strikingly beautiful: Camila Alves (left) said her draped yellow-gold strapless vintage Donna Karan Atelier gown was a last-minute choice, while Kaley Cuoco's dove grey fit and flare dress looked like it had been made for her
  
Isla Fisher - I think she is so pretty.  She has a very sweet, little girl beauty.  Hard to believe she's married to Sacha Baron Cohen (the grossest movie making man of all time).  She looks very 1930's in a lovely, silky, white slip of a dress, hair soft and beautiful, makeup good, earrings, perfect.  Grade:  A+

Va-va-voom! Isla Fisher (left) went for Old Hollywood glamour in her cream satin gown, Elisabeth Rohm (centre) stunned in her blush lace Marchesa column gown with all-over crystal and 3D silk-chiffon flower detail, while Katrina Bowden added some glitz to her simple black frock with gold embellished neck detail

Edie Falco.  HOLY SHIT.  Hair - bad; shoes - bad; ankles - thick.  It looks like her toddler  made it - she just glued a bunch of paper mache butterflies all over this potato sack.  Yikes.  Grade:  F- (it actually hurts my eyes!)

TV's leading ladies: Mindy Kaling (left) chose a figure-flattering deep blue dress with gold belted detail, Edie Falco (centre) picked an unusual black and grey butterfly-print number with high-low hemline, while Sufe Bradshaw dressed up her black frock with a sparkling tiara

Julia Louis-Dreyfus ... what can I say ... THE SAME OLD FUCKEN SIMPLE SKIN TIGHT DRESS.  I DO LIKE HER HAIR THOUGH.  Grade:  THE SAME.

Style mavens: Julia Louis-Dreyfus (left) showed off her trim and toned physique in a colourblock black and blue number, Sarita Choudhury (centre) opted for an intricately embroidered midnight blue frock, while Jennifer Grey went for a body-hugging black midi-dress

Jennifer Grey.  I actually like this dress however, NOT for the Critic's Choice Awards.  A nice wedding or New Years Eve perhaps ... NOT the red carpet.  But, because it looks great on her.  Grade:  A

Style mavens: Julia Louis-Dreyfus (left) showed off her trim and toned physique in a colourblock black and blue number, Sarita Choudhury (centre) opted for an intricately embroidered midnight blue frock, while Jennifer Grey went for a body-hugging black midi-dress

Mariah Carey.  F.  That's all.  A BIG, FAT F MINUS.  Fishnets?  Leather fingerless gloves?  Black suede pumps?  The dress is too short, the hair is too long, the legs are too fat.  Plus you're in too many eras girl!  (1980's, 1970s, 1990's!  Which is it!)

Fashion fails: Mariah Carey (left) showed a little too much skin in a one-shouldered LBD, teamed with fishnets and fingerless gloves, while  Amanda Peet dressed much older than her age in her frumpy frock

Juliette Lewis .... this dress looks like it was made out of the fabric on Lucy and Ricky Ricardo's patio furniture.  It also did not fit properly.  The neckline is too droopy and the length is too long.  All in all ... a DISASTER.  Grade:  F-

Juliette Lewis In Vivienne Westwood Gold Label - 2014 SAG Awards

So that's it ladies and germs.  My Best and Worst on the red carpet.  Hope you enjoyed it.  Coming soon .... THE ACADEMY AWARDS!!!  Stay tuned ...






5 comments:

  1. I LOVE awards season and you're a giant part of it! Thank you, thank you for your posts!

    I, too, cannot STAND Julia Roberts. Is she that great an actress that she's anybody? I don't get it. She doesn't even seem particularly nice as a person. Meryl Streep has never been able to dress herself well. She makes up for it in talent. LOVE HER! Love YOU!!! XOXO

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  2. Oh Deb, you are just too funny. I was howling at your big fat hate on for Julia. I have not idea why she looked so ridiculously drab when she could look amazing, easily (I don't hate her like you do--but I do think that she's over-utilized). And Meryl--always, always, always looks like a sack of potatoes. She obviously doesn't care, because she's known for this, and knows it herself. A testament to the fact that she has her own impenetrable power, and well-deserved. I think your critique was bang-on, even though I don't care about most of these people. Jared Leto better get the supporting actor award. He was un-effing-believable, and he's a lovely human being.

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  3. Abigail Breslin looks a little Amy Winehouse Goes Elvira.
    I like Julia, but she’s in that ‘I am actor’ outfit.
    Meryl can do no wrong because she’s Meryl and always stays Meryl.
    Jared Leto …. Dreamy.
    Lupita Nyong’o is fabulous at both shows.
    Margot Robbie? Not feeling it. Looks a little too 80s for me.
    Not feeling Sandy either; it’s got a saloon girl vibe with the belt.
    Ariel Winter. Either have those things taken down a couple of sizes or get a dress that fits.
    Amy Adams. I can’t help thinking she saw a picture of herself at The Globes and decided to switch things up. This is such an improvement.
    Cate Blanchett. Like, don’t love.
    Sarah Paulsen. The hair ruined it all.
    Jennifer Lawrence. I liked it but I’m over her.
    Julia in a onesie was kinda wrong.
    Kerry Washington would have rocked this look … BEFORE she got pregnant.
    Emma Thompson. Love her, love everything about her; thinking of being her for Halloween. But flats? C’mon!
    Claire Danes seemed to be trying harder since she knew there wasn’t a snowball’s chance in hell of her winning after Homeland’s sucky season.
    Sandy in Dress 2 looks like a Christmas present.
    Camila Alves always tries too hard.
    Isla Fisher rocked it.
    Edie Falco looks she just got off the couch in her dentist’s office waiting room and didn’t bother to go home and change.
    JLD. Same thing, different show—but I LOVE her.
    Jennifer Grey. Wrong dress. Wrong place. Wrong face.
    Mariah. Who let the dog out?
    Juliette Lewis. I kinda like it because it’s different.

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  4. I almost fell of my chair laughing when I read your review of Juliette Lewis. As usual, you’re right on target.

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